Thanks to social-networking sites like Facebook, many of the people that otherwise would have drifted out of our lives can now be linked to us indefinitely online, keeping track of us in the virtual world even if we no longer have any contact with them in “real life.” It’s a peculiar situation, evidenced by the introduction of terms like “Facebook Creeping” and FOMO (fear of missing out) into our vocabularies. But what are the wider implications of these changes?

Social networks enable us to cheat the natural order of things. In our ability to pore over photo albums and analyze status updates, we gain access to information that’s generally reserved for a close friend without actually having to be one. We look at others’ profiles because we are nosy, and because we want to make sure we’re not missing out – that we’re on par with our colleagues and friends. Furthermore, social networks create unnatural digital bonds that keep us entangled in unnecessary relationships. Most of the time it’s harmless, but in certain cases (ex-boyfriends, toxic friendships) these relationships could be unhealthy. A 2011 study identified a condition called “Facebook Envy” arguing that reading what others share on social networks might actually have a negative impact on mood. The existence of “Facebook Depression” is also being debated among health-care professionals.

I believe it is the lack of natural social decay that is driving some of these behaviours. After all, while some relationships end explosively, the majority decay naturally in a slow and gradual process. We drift apart. We lose contact. Far from replicating this natural passive disconnection online, we are forced to deliberately hit the “Unfriend” button, severing the connection in a swift and decisive manner. “Unfriending” is seen as a digitally aggressive act, and can often carry social implications in the real world. (An extreme example: In Iowa, a woman was arrested for burning down the house of someone who had unfriended her on Facebook.) It’s much easier to simply stay connected to these people online, even if we never communicate with them. Thus, we continue to be “Facebook friends” with people who aren’t really our friends.

Is it really necessary to stay connected to such people? Of course not, but many of us do so because it’s easier than having to look your colleague in the eye and explain why you haven’t accepted his or her friend request yet. We’d rather avoid that awkward moment, so we continue to broadcast pieces of our digital selves to an ever-growing circle that includes bosses, acquaintances, and distant relatives. The result? A need for better and more comprehensive privacy policies that take into account these social complexities.

These policies, however, are often in opposition to the corporate bottom line. Consider, for instance, Facebook’s never-ending push for users to publicly share more information about themselves. It is in Facebook’s best interest for us to continue to “friend” as many people as possible, as it provides the company with more data that it can extract and sell. As a result, Facebook is becoming a broader web that documents the connections of the people we have encountered in our lives, rather than a representation of our closest friends. For Mark Zuckerberg, social decay shouldn’t exist at all.

This, however, is not the only option.

One company that is introducing an alternative approach is Path, a mobile social network that uses the principles of Dunbar’s Number in an effort to manage social decay. Dunbar’s Number (commonly cited as 150) comes from the work of British anthropologist Robin Dunbar, and represents the “cognitive limit to the number of individuals with whom any one person can maintain stable relationships.”

Once users reach that 150 limit on Path, they’ll only be able to add another friend by cutting someone from their list. In this way, Path forces people to constantly evaluate their existing friendships by facing social decay head on.

It will be interesting to see how this social dynamic plays out. If I have 1,000 friends, I might not notice if someone has unfriended me – but I will definitely notice if I’m cut from a list of 150 people, especially if we have mutual friends. What impact will this have?

In this age of social networking, algorithms will continue to evolve to account for the various types of digital relationships that we have. Facebook and Path seem to be taking this in two very different directions, but is either one the right solution? Is there a way to organize our social relationships online that doesn’t lead to unhealthy behaviour?

Also posted on The Mark News

Hi friends! Happy 2012! I hope you enjoyed your holidays! I surprised Jesse with plane tickets home to Toronto for Christmas and it was so wonderful to spend time with our family and friends. The end of the year is always a time for reflection, if for no other reason than to remind yourself of all the things you did in the past 12 months!

One of my favorite things to do is to share my love of technology and innovation with others, and I was so lucky to be able to do that all around the world in 2011. I had a chance to speak in Mexico, Norway, Italy, Switzerland, Canada and the United States. After two and a half years at the World Economic Forum, I was ready to get back to writing. I moved to Paris full time and decided to embrace the city of light fully by taking a few months off. I spent the summer wandering through cobblestone streets, reading in cafes, and spending rainy afternoons tucked away playing Little Big Planet 2 and L.A. Noire.

Through copious amounts of internet browsing and reading, the table of contents and structure for ArchiTechs finally emerged and I started creating my outlines and organizing my thoughts. I jumped into the writing process and drafted chapters!

I became a Global Ambassador for Sandbox, and started contributing a bit more regularly to The Mark News  and HyperVocal.

My favorite moments of 2011 (in no particular order): 

1)  Geeks on a Plane Tour

Organized by Dave McClure of 500 Startups, I joined 40 other geeks on a whirlwind 10 day trip through Latin America to meet innovators and entrepreneurs in the region. We visited Brazil, Chile and Argentina. From a networking event at the top of Sugar Loaf Mountain in Rio to hearing the President of Chile speak in Santiago and staying up all night in Buenos Aires, I could not ask for a better group of people to experience this adventure with. My favorite part of the whole trip? The fact that I’m still close with the Geeks. Definitely one of my favorite trips. [Also, seeing Dave bust a move in a club: not to be missed.]

2) Having dinner with one of my favorite fiction authors, Nalini Singh in New York 

As some of you may know, I love writing in all its forms but have a special passion for fiction! I went to a writer’s conference in New York and had the opportunity to meet with one of my all time favorite authors: the wonderful Nalini Singh. I have been a fan of Nalini’s for the last five years and we’ve corresponded on and off during that time.

When I found out we would both be attending the same conference I sent her a note and was so delighted when she accepted! We had such a fun time that our coffee turned into dinner! Nalini writes incredible Paranormal/Urban Fantasy romances and her books are constantly in my re-reading cycle. It was a little weird to meet someone for the first time in person when you’ve spent years reading and experiencing bits and pieces of their imagination, but Nalini was so sweet and down to earth that I felt as though we’d been friends for years. I can’t wait to catch up with her again in 2012, I’ll ALMOST forgive her for making me wait for another 6 months for the next instalment in her series.

Read the books. So good! (If you don’t believe me check the Amazon reviews.)

3) Swimming in the Hot Springs in Banff, British Columbia

Whenever I’m traveling for work, I always try to spend  some time exploring the area I’m visiting. One of my favorite discoveries of 2011 was swimming in the outdoor natural hot springs nestled in the mountains of Banff, British Columbia. There is something that is so majestic about looking at mountains that’s amplified when you’re in a toasty natural jacuzzi.

4) Norway Road trip

There’s nothing more I love than a really good road trip. They are just so much fun! Nothing but the open road, guide books, good music and great conversations. In the past few years we’ve done road trips around Ireland, California, Floriday, Quebec and this year we added Norway to the list. We took 5 days and drove from Oslo to Bergen winding our way through the incredible fjords. The highlights include eating freshly caught salmon at the Bergen fish market and booking a REALLY remote hotel through booking.com i only to arrive at 10pm and find it completely shut down for the season. Jesse and I also became obsessed with Viking lore purchased some books that I read aloud while he drove. One of my Oslo highlights was the incredible Viking museum which features several actual Viking boats. [By the way, Vikings = Badasses]

5) Attending Kundavi/Sandbox TransAmerica Summit

I am very blessed to have a global network of friends and colleagues who I can call on if I need help with anything. The only downside is that being so spread out, we don’t really get to hang out all together very often. I was thrilled with Sandbox announced this Summit because I knew I would be spending the weekend in an absolutely stunning location with some of my favorite people. In addition the wonderful conversations and exchange of ideas, the programming also included some unique activities as well. I slept under the stars on the beach, spent a few insane hours inside a sweat lodge with a Shaman, swam in the pacific at 3am and hopped a fence for the first time since I was 14, lol.